Funk

Don’t know why don’t ask why it just is. I am in a funk – perhaps it is hormonal post op related is my guess but I don’t like it. I don’t like being short with people or pissed off with people or not want to interact or be around people but today I was.  I don’t like it.

I believe that “I” have a choice – a choice to make the day better, a choice to make my mood better – to not rely on outside influences – but today I couldn’t. I continue to be just pissed off – no reason that I can find, no one has done anything to put me in this funk – and I am not pleased about it.

Perhaps it was because I had a terrible night of sleep or lack there of. I saw ever hour of the clock up until 6 AM when I drifted off until 9:30 AM. Yesterday I felt awful with nausea and general bleech. I stayed in bed most of the day resting and cat napping,  other than getting up for dinner of take out Chinese which was yummy and a great idea hubby 🙂

I have a busy week coming up – perhaps that is part of my funk? I don’t know. The Convention is going to be a busy one with a very full agenda. I know I can grab my lunch at the food court and head back to the room for a lay down/rest. I am excited yet concerned for my own being & health. I need to remind myself that my recovery comes first as I only get one chance to get it right.

Physically today is one of the best days I have had.  I am not aching in my lower abdomen, my back is feeling pretty good – I am feeling almost like I haven’t had anything done just over 3 weeks ago.  I am sure this week I will be reminded of my recent surgery and to take it easy.

The snow is almost gone. The snowdrops are in full bloom. The primulas are lovely. Perhaps I am just restless and missing work – missing the things I take for granted and do so automatically.  Our grandson was over today and I still can not pick him up – and that sucks. He is adorable and lovable – his newest word is “bug boo”. I called him my “little bug a boo” and he parrots back “bug boo”. It’s very adorable.

I will prepare a few more things for my journey tomorrow. I am looking forward to seeing friends and acquaintances over the next few day. I hope things more in a positive direction t the Convention for all nurses.

Wishing you peace & blessings,