to subject to incapacitating emotional or mental stress
Sounds pretty simple, right? Just relax, let go, don’t sweat it however it is not that basic or easy.
The mind that won’t shut down, the voice in your head that keeps asking are you doing enough? Are you doing too much? Should you be offering more? Should you do the laundry? Could you, should you, will you????? Unable to get away from the thoughts, unable to shut it down and just be present, calm, breathing, in with the peace, out with the chaos. Repeat.
Worrying too much about things that I have no control over, knowing that my worrying won’t change the outcome or even impact the outcome. In my head I know these things but I can not get my mind to slow, pause or take a break. I know worrying solves nothing other than taking up space in my head.
Self-care has been lacking, I am no longer enjoying those things that brought me pleasure before. I feel like a lump. A struggle for even the simplest of activities – watering the garden, making the coffee, folding the laundry as all exhausting.
I need to let go of things that I can not change. I need to repeat the Serenity Prayer and follow the words, bringing peace and focus to myself. Breathing in all the good positive things in my world and exhaling the negative, chaos (or perceived), hurt…….. and be at peace within myself.
I wish you peace, kindness and calm. I will continue to seek this as well for myself.